Jesus’ hand pressed on my chest.

I woke and made eye contact.

Sweat saturated my neck and shoulders.

He performed CPR.

The breath of life at all angles.

 

“Listen, are you listening?”

 

I nodded.

 

“You aren’t dying.

Your heart is strong.

This deep press on your heart

is waiting for a response.

I am acquainted with grief.

I am a man of sorrows.”

 

I could feel heat in my eyes.

 

“I wept

over Jerusalem

over Lazarus.”

 

I blinked tears that burned down.

 

“Things do get complicated

and the sorting out and attempts

of nailing those things down wearies you.”

 

I looked away.

 

“They tried to nail me down too.

I was too complicated.

I still Am to many.

Even you try to secure Me with nails.”

 

Eye contact.

 

“Yes, even now you try to manage Me.

You aren’t the only one.

But you are the one I am talking to now.”

 

His hand kept pressing in intervals

and pushed blood through the chambers.

 

“I am.”

 

I nodded.

 

“I Am.”

 

Tears flowed unhindered

and drenched His hand

while the compressions continued.

I so wanted to nail His hand

to my heart.

Return of the Prodigal by Rembrant


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9 responses to “Low Grade Depression”

  1. Ann Kilter Avatar

    You’re just going to have to put a book together of these poems, and prose, and essays one of these days. 🙂

  2. hollieyoung Avatar
    hollieyoung

    Absolutely amazing. I needed this today! I’m going to share with my friend if thats okay?

    1. Jerry Avatar

      So glad the timing was right. Poems are meant to be shared my friend.

  3. Jerry Avatar

    Reblogged this on Gerald the Writer and commented:

    He knows and gets it.

  4. Jerry Angeletti Avatar
    Jerry Angeletti

    I have found that the unwelcomed cousin of depression and fear is surprisingly …anger.

    While it may sound overly simple and even inconceivable, it is invaluable fir introspection.

    Anger has many forms and it hides best when its root is “disappointment”. This us what I have discovered about me.

    1. Jerry Avatar

      Agreed Jerry. They are often interchangeable.

  5. Jerry Angeletti Avatar
    Jerry Angeletti

    I have found that the unwelcomed cousin of depression and fear is surprisingly …anger.

    While it may sound overly simple and even inconceivable, it is invaluable for introspection.

    Anger has many forms and it hides best when its root is “disappointment”. This is what I have discovered about me.

  6. Jasper Hoogendam Avatar

    Sometimes a line has a way of standing out because of the slight shift in nuance. Love this one…
    “They tried to nail me down too.

    I was too complicated.

    I still Am to many.

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